On being human

I haven’t been sad in a really long time but this week I was sad.

I was sad because I miss you. I was sad because there’s a million things I want to tell you. I was sad because even though it’s been seven years without you, the loss of you still hurts.

It hurts because as time goes on I realize how lonely you must have been. I realize how distraught you must have been.

I realize how sad you must have been.

I wish I could have told you this sadness wouldn’t last. I wish I could have told you while your feelings are strong, they’re only temporary. I wish we could have made pizza rolls and watched a stupid movie. I wish I could have told you that it’s ok to not be ok.

It’s not embarrassing. It doesn’t make you any less.

It’s what makes you human.

This week I was sad. I ate cake with your family and then I went home and cried. Life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes it’s heartbreak and bad coffee cake. The good thing is that life keeps moving.

The highs balance out the lows. You may be sad now but it won’t last.

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